Tag Archives: Affection

Getting Spanked

Proverbs 20:30

30 The blueness of a wound cleanseth away evil: so do stripes the inward parts of the belly.
30 Blows and wounds scrub away evil, and beatings purge the inmost being. (NIV)

Earning a Spanking

Growing up, I was not always the most well-behaved child.

My parents would tell me to do something or not to do something, and I every so often I would ignore their commands.

What was the result?

Most times, I would be laid over a knee and spanked two or three times.

I eventually learned that there are consequences to my actions, and sometimes those consequences hurt.

Western culture may frown on such things today, but the Bible tells us of the benefits of a good spanking (or other such discipline).

Spiritual Spanking

As a whole, we tend to ignore God on a relatively consistent basis.

This could be by not doing something we know we should, doing something we know we should not, or doing or not doing something that we understand from common sense needs to be done or not.

And God reprimands us.

In your struggle against sin, you have not yet resisted to the point of shedding your blood. And have you completely forgotten this word of encouragement that addresses you as a father addresses his son? It says,

“My son, do not make light of the Lord’s discipline, and do not lose heart when he rebukes you, because the Lord disciplines the one he loves, and he chastens everyone he accepts as his son.” (Proverbs 3:11-12)

Endure hardship as discipline; God is treating you as his children. For what children are not disciplined by their father? If you are not disciplined—and everyone undergoes discipline—then you are not legitimate, not true sons and daughters at all.
Hebrews 12:4-8, NIV

Do not look at hardship, beatings, and pain as necessarily bad. They could be God’s spankings that are the means of growth and understanding.

Heavenly Father, purge us of all evil and give us the wisdom to understand that it is happening. Help us grow in Your righteousness.


Pleasing Dad, Despising Mom

Proverbs 15:20

20 A wise son maketh a glad father: but a foolish man despiseth his mother.

Following God?

On Sunday, January 9, 2000, I finally knelt my knee to Jesus as Savior, and I started my life with God.

In 2007, many things happened in my life. The biggest was that I started over with God. I asked Him to clean my heart and take me back to that place of innocence and trust, and I needed to start from scratch.

Unfortunately, some of the people with whom I chose to associate during this time led me down some less-than-traditional theological roads. I became convinced that God had revealed much truth to me (which He had), and I had a better understanding of His will than most people (this might be true in some sense, from time to time, from person to person, but …)

It was incredibly prideful of me to assume I had a better connection to God than others. My parents did not understand everything going on, and they panicked. On many points it was unnecessary (technically, it is never good to panic), but on many other points they had good reason. The called the pastor for the four of us to have a meeting.

While I said I loved my parents, my behavior of superiority showed how much I despised my parents and our pastor. I despised them by thinking of them as poor, misguided fools who understood little of God.

I despised my mother in my heart, and I was unaware.

Following God

I eventually came to my senses. God allowed so many things in my life that caused so much confusion and soul-searching. When I came back home months later, I apologized to my parents. Within a year I had straightened many of the things that had caused so much tension (and even introduced them to the woman now their daughter-in-law!).

It was a great joy to truly follow God and see my life straighten out. It has never been “perfect” or pain-free, but opening myself to following God instead “knowing” what God wanted led to great peace.

One of the greatest joys of my life came two years after that intervention. It was standing in the church at my wedding and seeing my dad smile as he said “I am so proud of you.”

Heavenly Father, help us to live a life worthy of You. Help us to love our parents, to treat them with respect and humility. Help us love others and live in a way that, when we finally see You face to face, we can hear You say “I am so proud of you!”


Proverbs 12:25

25 Heaviness in the heart of man maketh it stoop: but a good word maketh it glad.

Pain & Sadness

When I was engaged to be married to a woman who was not quite right for me, it dragged us both down. When I knew God did not want me with that woman, I knew I had to end the relationship.

The bad news is that I did not want to. This led to a deep depression. My heart was so heavy that it held me in place, emotionally and physically. I was practically useless for a couple of weeks and literally useless for a few days, those last days of which I sat slouched on a couch not moving except to go to the bathroom.

My heavy heart literally made me stoop and slouch.

I was in mourning for a relationship that had yet to end.

Good Words

It seemed that nothing anyone said could help.

The thing that did it was a dear brother in the Lord saying “God loves you. Show Him you love Him, too.”

It made me realize how to live out Jesus’ words: “If any man come to me, and hate not his father, and mother, and wife, and children, and brethren, and sisters, yea, and his own life also, he cannot be my disciple.” (Luke 14:26)

I needed to show God that I loved Him more than anything or anyone else. It took a friend’s words to lift me up and make me move.

Kindness & Love

It is a great kindness to share a good word with someone with a heavy heart full of pain and/or sadness. It should be done with love, and that love should be the love of God.

Someone can offer a kind word, even a good word, to someone, but if it is done at the wrong time or in the wrong way it can have the opposite effect.

Sometimes, the best thing to say is nothing at all. It is just to sit there, to be there.

God of mercy and kindness, thank You for leading us to and through those times of pain and sadness. Thank You that You also provide us with those people and words that can lift us up to gladness, again. Give us a heart to share that love and kindness to others, and give us the wisdom to know when to speak and when to simply be there.


Proverbs 12:4

4 A virtuous woman is a crown to her husband: but she that maketh ashamed is as rottenness in his bones.

Two Paths

I was engaged to be married once, before I met my wife.

The Ex

There were a lot of good qualities about my ex-fiancée, such as being intelligent, beautiful, and creative. She also had some qualities that were not as good, but the strongest of these is that we were not really a good match.

During our relationship, we both walked dangerous paths. We drank a lot of alcohol, together and separately, much of the time. We got into smoking many things (all of the legal variety). We began “sleeping together” about half way through our relationship. We became bitter and even mean toward others and eventually ourselves.

That relationship wore me out: physically, emotionally, and spiritually.

I call much of our relationship “the time I should not have called myself a Christian,” because … well … read Galatians 5:19-21, and I/we at least seriously considered or at worst did almost everything on that list.

My Wife

When I met the woman who became my wife, we did things differently.

The relationship began with a promise of purity and a dedication to God. Even when we are angry with each other (yes, it happens in good relationships, too!) we still find good things to say to each other. (To be honest, our “fights” last mere moments, and our anger subsides in even less time … often instantly)

We lift each other up in prayer, worship God together, and find ourselves sacrificing in some way for the other on a regular basis … only to receive the greater blessing of joy and happiness, as we both enjoy much of the same things, anyway!

This may not be the exact picture of all strong couples, but there will always be similarities.

The Church

Now consider this: Jesus Christ has called the Church His Bride (As evidenced in Ephesians 5 and Revelation 21-22).

How do you treat the Husband?

Do you lift up and bless or cause shame and bitterness?

O God, strengthen our relationships with love and grace. Give us the wisdom to know when a relationship is healthy or not. Guide us in all righteousness that we may bless You with our lives.